@A_NY_Zone61 - Did you find what you were born to do?

@A_NY_Zone61 - I can honestly see you as a filmmaker man!

In ways I have and in other ways I haven't.
My favorite Churchill quote is "Never, never, never give up."

@godfatherofgreenbay - Can you elaborate? In which ways did you find it? That's another great quote that everybody should abide to.

I think I've been put here to entertain.  I teach and I do whatever I do on Xanga.  There are times I don't think I'm reaching my full potential and then there's the whole thing of entertaining a family which I don't have.

@kachino - As best as I can explain it,I was always into pop culture stuff, movies, videogames, and especially comic books. I was 14 going on 15, coming to grips with how terrible life can be, always looking at movies and comic books to cheer me up, and along with wanting to see sad things because a close relative was dying, I needed to see things that were easy to relate to in my state of sorrow at the time. I was very moved by a movie that not many would expect. 

It was the Crow City of Angels, I rented it along with the Crow part 1 because I had seen them when I was younger, and wanted to rewatch them again as I was older because I sensed something deep in them,from what I could remember, that I wanted to explore. I got more than what I bargained for. Soon as I finished part 1 and then saw part 2, that made everything full circle for me. I was very moved by it, emotionally powerful, and due to remembering good happy memories of my childhood and that clashing with my reality as a teen in a very dreaded place to grow up in.

At that age, regardless of the bad things going on, the way I visually saw things, for some reason, it looked like it would make for a great movie. It became very clear that my active imagination could be put to good use as a movie director because I have a very personal movie I wanna make which in the end is just another story to tell.

Je suis d ' accord avec la citation de Churchill . Depuis l' enfance,j ' ai toujours voulu être dans l' ensignement et je crois que j' ai plutôt bien réussi compte tenu du point de départ .
Oui il faut savoir reconnaître l'opportunité qui vous épanouira et la saisir .

Amitié

Michel

@kachino - Thank you very much for the kind words, they are also inspirational. You are right, about that "internal fire", it's my determination and ambition to make my goal come true in being in the movie industry and making my movies. After everything that's happened, I know that since this means so much to me, I should never give up on it no matter how tough or discouraging it may get, at times. 

So what I've been doing is trying to be active by working on any movie(independent movies, not Hollywood),tv commercial, or music video sets. I've been more active last year after graduation from college, but before participating in these, I realized that the best thing to do is to learn as much as you can about the industry that you desire to be part of and work for. That's great advice I was given before and that's what I highly recommend for everyone. 

There are gonna be some things that are discouraging because in my case, I have no experience at all and I went the route of not going to film school because I feel with technology advancing in electronics and cameras, it is not that necessary. But I still needed help and one of the good things to do in this case is to befriend someone who is a film major, though it may be hard to do that, give it a try, or just keep on networking. Get to know more and more people on each set that you get a chance to work on. Also, I'm not directing, as much as I want to be hired for that, I've been put to other positions to start out and put on my resume. I've been gaffer, grip, assistant cameraman, filled in as an extra, have a small acting role, be a Production Assistant, and lastly an Assistant Director.

No matter that I haven't been given a gig as a movie director yet, or even been paid at all for my services, I found it important to learn how these different positions function and how tough it is for people behind the scenes because you can easily get tired and feel like you exercised from doing these things. As I mentioned not being paid, it's true, due to my lack of experience, that's how I've been put into that situation by those in charge of these productions sets. It's their way of taking advantage of newcomers who need experience, and can get away with not paying so they save some money. So yeah, I'm seeing the exploitative side of filmmaking and how the movie industry is seen as, oftentimes. 

That also brings me to another thing, that one has to accept that they may have to make compromises and sacrifices in order to get the objective done. So, I'm getting my experience at least and when I save a lot of money, I'm gonna start filming some short movies on my own terms, and put them out on film festivals and we'll see where this takes me.

@CastigadoR - Yeah, that internal fire needs to be kept alive at all time. It will always help you go through tough or discouraging times. I really like the fact that you have a plan to achieve your goals. Nothing will replace the actual experience you can get on the field. You can go to school for filmmaking all you want ... but nothing will ever replace the hands-on experience you can get on a movie/tv set.

Life will always throw curve balls at you. It's up to you to adjust to it ... or strike out every time you're face that kind of pitch. When you take things for granted, life will throw something at you in order to remind you that you shouldn't do that. You might not have experience right now but if you continue to knock on doors, at some point someone will give you a chance. You can't give up until you get that first chance. If that first chance doesn't work, you need to continue ... I know it sounds super simple but NOT everybody is willing to do that. Not everybody will hold on to their dreams and continue to work hard despite all the adversity they're facing.

Networking is really important. Sometimes the people you know are more important than your skills. Some wise man once told me that the most important thing is the people you know and how you present yourself to them. Knowing new people will broaden your horizons ... and you just never know what kind of impact they can have on your life ... good or bad. Same thing about your impact on them. You just never know so therefore you can't stop yourself from meeting new people.

I like how you're thinking. About getting smaller roles to fill up your resume before applying for a directing job. I wish you all the luck in the world for that because that's your passion. Like I said before, nothing will ever replace "on site" experience. That kind of experience is just invaluable ... despite the fact that you're not getting paid at all.

Every time you get something, you will lose something ... and every time you lose something, you will get something in return. You might not know what those things are at the beginning but if you really think about it, you will find what those things are. Compromises and sacrifices are really easy to do when you see the big picture ... when you have a bigger goal to reach ... especially when that thing is the thing you're born to do :).

One thing you might want to do is to read the biography of successful filmmakers. You will be able to see the other side of the story that not everybody is willing to read/see. You will see all the struggles they had to go through in order to reach the point they're today. It also might inspire you at a completely different level. Like I said before, I wish you all the luck in the world ... and the courage to create your own opportunities.

@CastigadoR - You can't really lose your inspiration if it's from within you. I understand that things happen and it can affect it ... but nobody will focus on your dream more than yourself. If you allow yourself to divert from it, nobody will really put you back on the right track. Only you have that power. Things are incredible on my part ... thank you very much for the wishes!